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Posted: 12 Jun 2009 04:30 AM PDT The Pope went on vacation for a few days to visit the rugged mountains of Alaska. He was cruising along the campground in the Pope Mobile when he heard a frantic commotion just at the edge of the woods. He found a helpless Democrat wearing wearing shorts, sandals, a Vote for Obama hat and a Save the Trees shirt. The man was screaming and struggling frantically, thrashing all about and trying to free himself from the grasp of a 10-foot grizzly bear. As the Pope watched in horror, a group of Republican loggers wearing Go Sarah shirts came racing up. One quickly fired a 44 magnum slug right into the bear’s chest. The two other men pulled the semiconscious Democrat from the bear’s grasp. Then using baseball bats, the three loggers finished off the bear. Two of the men dragged the dead grizzly onto the bed of their pickup truck while the other tenderly placed the injured Democrat in the back seat. As they began to leave, the Pope summoned al of them men over to him. “I give you my blessing for your brave actions!” he proudly proclaimed. “I have heard there was bitter hatred between Republican loggers and Democratic environmental activists, but now I’ve seen with my own eyes that this is not true.” As the Pope drove off, one logger asked his buddies, “Who the heck was that guy?” “Dude, that was was the Pope,” another replied. “He’s in direct contact with Heaven and has access to all wisdom.” “Well,” the logger said, “he may have access to all wisdom, but he doesn’t know squat about bear hunting! By the way, is the bait still alive or do we need to go back to Massachusetts and get another one?” |
Posted: 11 Jun 2009 05:45 AM PDT Tata Thursday beings out all the big guns this week. Some ladies are so ell endowed with sweater puppies that they are unable to contain them with clothing and are forced to use their hands to keep them in check. What these women have to go through to keep these babies looking good for you amazes me. Thank goodness that are up to the tasks.
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Posted: 11 Jun 2009 05:30 AM PDT |
Posted: 11 Jun 2009 05:15 AM PDT |
Posted: 11 Jun 2009 05:00 AM PDT Shakira Isabel Mebarak Ripoll, better known has simply Shakira, is a 32 year old Colombian singer and songwriter. She has been a major star in Spanish music since 1995, but didn’t gain a US audience until her 2001 release of Whenever, Wherever. She has taken home two Grammy Awards, eight Latin Grammy Awards, and was nominated for a Golden Globe. She will be shaking her hips again when he releases a new album sometime in 2009.
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Posted: 11 Jun 2009 04:45 AM PDT
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Posted: 11 Jun 2009 04:30 AM PDT Usually everyone who has a dog would call him Rover or something, well I call mine “Sex”. Sex is a very embarrassing name, but I never knew how embarrassing until one day I took Sex for a walk and he ran away from me. I spent hours looking for him. A police officer came along and asked me what I was doing in the alley at 4 o’clock in the morning. I said, “I was looking for Sex.” My court case comes up next Thursday. One day I went to City Hall to get a license for Sex. The clerk asked me what I wanted, I told him I wanted a license for Sex. He said “I would like to have one too!” When I said “But this is a dog,” he said he didn’t care what she looked like. Then I said, “You don’t understand. I’ve had Sex since I was two years old.” He replied, “You must have been a strong boy.” When I decided to get married, I told the minister that I wanted to have Sex at the wedding. He told me to wait until after the wedding. I said, “But Sex has played a big part in my life and my whole lifestyle revolves around Sex.” He said he did not want to hear about my personal life and would not marry us in a church. I told him everyone coming to the wedding would enjoy having Sex there. The next day we were married by the Justice of the Peace. My family is barred from the church. |
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